Me: Gnuh. Woke up with a tongue twister stuck in my head.
J: What's that?
Me: "I am the pleasant peasant pheasant plucker."
J: So... what did that have to do with anything?
Me: NOTHING. That's the messed up part.
J: So what were you dreaming about?
Me: A bunch of random stuff. Oh! By the way, if you sneak off to a party and end up making out with an underage high school member of a latina gang I will be ROYALLY pissed at you.
Me: Not the least of which because the party bus taking me home will go into a subway while I am hanging out the sunroof and cut my head off.
J: I thought you were supposed to wake up before you die?
Me: Yeah, I got past that when I was about 7. It sucks. Don't do it.
J: ...OK then.