Mel Hynes (takhisis) wrote,
Mel Hynes

It came from the dollar store!

A few days ago, flemco dragged me to a local "everything for a dollar" shop that he'd come across, looking for halloween items. I ended up picking up some items just on sheer wrongness value, all of which I shall cover eventually, but the highlight of them was this beauteous piece of health technology: The Waist Trimmer! Ignoring the fact that it is quite literally a sheet of rubber with cheap fabric and a velcro strip on one side, the packaging made it all the more wonderful.

If I'd had any faith in a wight-loss item bought at a dollar outlet to begin with, it might've been shattered by the fact that the front image appears to have not even been photoshopped, but merely blobbed over in MS Paint. Despite the holy command to TRUST THE WAIST TRIMMER! I'm also not sure if I want my perspirationhealthy elevated, thank you. But the real gems are on the side of the package.

Try saying that all in one breath (since there's almost no punctuation). Hell, try saying "confareaeable" at all on the first try. But at least it's easy to clearn!

And some bonus horror, although not on the bad translation angle, here's the top of the package:

Yes, that does translate to "Not recommended for children under 3 years." I mean, I know that underage obesity is a growing problem, but this is fragging ridiculous.
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