June 15th, 2010

O Cats

Just because everyone needs a grinder they can fantasize about shoving someone in

First just the layout of the various ingredients. If you want a full list of ingredients and instructions, check out these places:


These sites are very similar, but have information on tweaks depending on what your cat(s) need. Please note that this process requires you to think and do math and crap! It's a pain, but you DO need to actually tweak ingredients based on how fat your cat is, whether they get constipated, etc. Once you get the hang of it, it's not hard. In my eyes, it's easier than plotting a blood glucose curve on Raist, and a HELL of a lot easier than trying to chart DPS on my Affliction Lock. < /geek> So. more work than opening a can, plunking it down and bailing, but in the long run healthier and a LOT cheaper.

I had to mention that the red wine was not included, since due to the comic, you never know. Also, I am adding 2 cans of tuna to the mix, which is not in either recipe. This is because my cats are picky little whiners and wouldn't eat the stuff, but if I dropped a dollop of tuna water on it they'd scarf it down without complaint. I'm hoping mixing it in will get them to eat it straight, and extra fish oil is all to the better.

The first step is always the hardest/stinkiest. You have to rip the skin off all the thighs, chop off as much meat as you can, then chop the meat into cat-bite-sized pieces, because this makes them chew on stuff and replicates the teeth-cleaning action of dry food that commercial canned food lacks. YET ANOTHER BENEFIT! But make it too big and they'll ignore it, make it too small and they don't have to chew. So going for around the mass of a regular die (doesn't have to be the shape, longer & thinner serves the same purpose) seems to be the ideal.

The best recommendation I got for this and boy is it good: buy a pair of poultry shears or dedicated kitchen scissors. Chopping the meat took me about 3 hours, cutting it up with the scissors took me about 45 mins. The only hard part is keeping your SO from borrowing them for hideously dulling household projects.

And, as the video note says: I am being slightly unfair, the chicken was about 2 days from its expiry date so was still perfectly good but VERY stinky when I started tearing the fat off. But still, the man has produced MUCH worse and was being histrionic about it.

Finally dragged him out to take video of me grinding, just so you can get size & scope on the Epic Beastie.

J. was totally fair in his "please be careful!" statement because the grinder is specifically designed to pulverize bones instantly. Which is why it's good for pet food, since it needs bone meal. What he couldn't see from his angle was that I was only scraping supplement powder and skin scraps from the safety hopper to the mouth of the feed. If you note where my hand goes to in previous drops and where the edge of the bowl goes down to when I am tipping things in, you can see how the safety hopper has a disconcertingly steep angle into the feed, where actual danger happens. From the side it looks like I'm stuffing my hand in, but in reality I'm a good 2" from even entering the danger zone of the lip of the feed tube (which gives me an additional 4" leeway after that).

Trust me, I've already cut off one finger, I am way paranoid about ever doing it again! But I do very much appreciate his looking out for me. :) One of the many reasons we're married!